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Valentines wishes from Lauren Kate

Thursday, February 20 @ 12:32:05 PM

Dear Friends,

It’s Valentines Day. . . .

Some of you are reading this showered with rose petals (your boyfriend wants you to put down your phone and taste his gluten-free chocolate cake). Others are reading this after a Screw-Commercialized-Love-Movie-Night at your BFFs. Even if you opted to go Lauren-Kate-in-tenth-grade-style—bedroom door locked, The Verve Pipe on repeat in your earbuds, at the head of a river of blue foil Dove wrappers snagged from your guidance counselor’s candy bowl—chances are you’re at least thinking about love.

Lauren Kate eventA few friends and I recently fell into a conversation about the times we’d really been in love. We went around the room and stated our numbers, which ranged from two to seven. We made fun of each other’s crazy exes. We held moments of silence for a few profound, departed relationships. We recalled romances that had once paraded as love but looked shabby in the focused light of perspective. We doubted each other’s claims (“You broke up with him to have a fling with a Croatian waiter who spoke no English—that was not love!”) At the end, we marveled at our mended hearts and the wounds we thought would hurt forever.

I saw those numbers floating over each of our heads, and I wondered about the people they represented, how many others each of them had loved, how much love all that added up to. Even though most of the relationships my friends and I spoke about that night had long passed their expiration dates, I knew the love that we had all felt was still in the world, and I felt buoyed by it. Past, present, and future love is all around us: a shield against pain, a performance-enhancing drug, a key to a future of more.

heartsI wish you love this season, in whatever form it takes for you. So many crushes you’ve lost count. Belly laughs with old friends. Kissing. Chocolate. Vulnerability. Fleeting moments of true contentment.

My husband and I have a Valentine’s Day tradition of catching a matinee before heading home to roll out some pasta. Chocolate is a completely acceptable appetizer. I like to light a candle and slick on lip gloss. I might tell him about the most romantic book I’ve read recently while he puts on a record. I hope you enjoy sharing in some of my traditions—and that you start or continue some of your own.

With love,



What I’m reading: Winger by Andrew Smith

What I’m watching: Her

What I’m listening to: “Devil or Angel” by Lou Doillon